The introduction of Joe the Plumber (the guy who isn't really a plumber, who doesn't really earn $250k a year and who is nowhere near being able to buy his boss's business - he's actually somewhat of a bum) into our political discourse this past week is the latest outrage du jour that's causing veins to pop on conservative foreheads from sea to shining sea.
The McCainiacs and the Palinbots have taken to the streets, and to the airwaves and to the printed word, in a wild-eyed effort to use Joe the fake plumber as red white and blue proof that Barack Obama is a "socialist" intent on taking money from hard-working Joe's paycheck and redistribute it to the welfare queens and the illegal immigrants and the working poor democrats and deny Joe his chance at the American dream.
Aside from the laughable proposition that Joe and his new BFF's have probably had more money stolen from them just in the past month by the Wall Street embezzlers than could ever be trickled down in lifetime of incrementally increased payroll taxes, you really have to wonder whether they even have the slightest bit of intellectual acumen to understand what true socialism is.
My online dictionary defines "socialism" basically this way:
socialism
noun:
1. a political theory advocating state ownership of industry
2. an economic system based on state ownership of capital
Apparently our angst-ridden, perturbed conservative friends haven't yet to catch on that the largest socialist program ever to cut a swath across America's golden plains of capitalism has taken place not only in their lifetimes, but has actually occurred just in the past several weeks. I refer of course to the massive Wall Street and banking industry bailout that is putting a whole industry and a hefty sum of it's capital under state ownership. The only caveat for this socialism is that it benefits not Joe the plumber or Dan the dairy man, but instead financially props up those dregs of society named Rockefeller, Chase and Carnegie.
Honestly though, based on the gnashing of teeth and mindless accusations flying spittle-covered out of the mouths of conservatives, I am convinced that your average Joe the plumber or Dan the dairy man wouldn't know socialism if it walked up to him on the street and bitch-slapped him. The extent of their knowledge of socialism begins and ends with each of them red-faced, pointing fingers and screaming at the top of their lungs -- "Obama is a socialist." Their fire-breathing tirades aimed at the Illinois Senator are almost like watching old 1930's news reels of Nazi-instigated German bourgeois citizens screaming "Juden" while throwing bricks at the windows of Jew-owned businesses and dragging Jews out of their homes and business by the hair into the waiting arms of the Brownshirt thugs -- the same thugs who told them the Jews were the cause of their economic misery. What a sad spectacle.
Another fact that amuses me to no end about Joe and his friends' willful ignorance on this subject is that they have been told on many occasion by their political hero John McCain that he himself is a Teddy Roosevelt Republican. Well, if anything positive can be said at this stage about McCain it's that he is Rush Limbaugh smart, I'll give him that. He and his handlers certainly know how to appeal to the base instincts of the rubes on an emotional and anti-intellectual level. Of course, once again, if the rubes were to be plied with a modest dose of real facts, they'd probably think it some evil communist brain-washing tactic. Here's a few quotes from that great anti-socialist Teddy Roosevelt, that if one were to attribute them to Barack Obama, would likely cause the poor wingnut brains to explode en-masse:
"As a matter of personal conviction, and without pretending to discuss the details or formulate the system, I feel that we shall ultimately have to consider the adoption of some such scheme as that of a progressive tax on all fortunes..."
"The man of great wealth owes a peculiar obligation to the State, because he derives special advantages from the mere existence of government."
"The inheritance tax . . . is both a far better method of taxation, and far more important for the purpose of having the fortunes of the country bear in proportion to their increase in size a corresponding increase and burden of taxation."
So, in a sense, it's kind of fun watching the wing-nuts twist themselves into pretzel shapes trying to deny reality and truth and instead embrace the emotional caterwauling of their political puppet masters. What's not fun is watching a proud nation devolve into a state of affairs where a large percentage of the populace embraces neo-fascist ideals compounded by hatred and willful ignorance. It does not bode well for the long-term survival of our democracy.
----k
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