March 3, 2010, 9:57 am
Cheese Thief Jailed for 7 Years in California
By ROBERT MACKEY
Updated | 11:38 a.m. On Monday, more than a year after a man was arrested outside a market in California with a $3.99 bag of Tillamook shredded cheese in his pants he had not paid for, a judge decided to go relatively easy on him, sentencing him to seven years and eight months in jail.
It goes without saying that I might have been sufficiently impressed with this heroic effort to save humanity from a $3.99 cheese thief if it weren't for the fact that so many white collar banksters, CEO's, and Wall Street thieves are presently running around enjoying the privileges of freedom by picking the pockets of hard working, law-abiding Americans and looting the national treasury. Put a few thousand of those slimy bastards on a ditch-digging chain gang and you've got my support.
Until that version of justice comes to fruition though, I only have this to say to the people who've sent the $3.99 cheese thief up the river -- you can take your bourgeois version of justice and shove it up your fucking bourgeois asses.
Just saying . . .